Her bare feet froze against the fine stone floor, sending a chill through her body.
She crossed the large room to the elaborately carved mantelpiece, staring blankly into the coals of the once crackling
She removed her bathrobe, removing the silver from it’s pocket.
She lowered herself to the rug splayed across the floor before the fire’s grate.
All Blaise Zabini wanted was acceptance. Acceptance from her family. Real acceptance from her so-called friends. Acceptance
from her House.
Yes, she was a Muggle-born, but she was also a true Slytherin, whether her blood be pure.
This school meant everything to her. It was the one place she was free - the only place she could be herself.
Tears rose unbidden in her eyes. The sort of tears that built up until they had no where else to go except trace delicately
along the cheek.
All these years she had kept this secret buried deep inside. Nobody was ever going to know.
And then, by a damned foolish mistake, everything had turned upside down. She had left her diary open on her bed. Pansy
Parkinson and Millicent Bulstrode had read it, and immediately spread the news within the House.
Now Slytherin House hated her.
She was guaranteed one thing, however: As ashamed as the House was, they would never let the secret fly through the school
that she was a mudblood.
The race they had hated most living among them. The dirtiest of blood.
Even Crabbe and Goyle weren’t that stupid.
But this ordeal had brought her back to her dark days.
She was hated like this in grade school. Instantaneously they had judged her.
And because of the fact that she did not have the straight-board normality of her “perfect” family,
she had been disowned by her mother.
Her own mother.
She had nobody to turn to except for her divorced father. And even he could not do everything.
~Don’t know where I belong~
Oh, Jesus, those were bad days.
Until she got that fateful letter. She knew immediately what she was going to do once she read the letter. She was going
to start over. It was a chance to make friends - to be accepted.
Indeed it had turned out to be that way.
And when she had seen him for the first time. . .
He was the most beautiful boy she’d ever seen. The mere fact that he was so haughty and smug - in other words the
opposite of her - she was quickly drawn to him.
She had seen something beneath his shell.
Blaise just had to know him. . .
And now, after six years, her world had come to a crumble.
She couldn’t stand it anymore! She hated who she was and hated being here so much now. . .
She, once more, was alone in this world. . .
She needed escape. The kind of freedom that held unbroken promises. A simple sanctuary that expected nothing of her whatsoever.
Blaise raised her wrist slightly, bringing the sharp, thin, and bright silver to a hover over her left wrist.
How she longed for that divine release. That beautiful calm that was a gift from . . . somewhere.
One sharp pain, and she would be free. . . Forever. . .
~I can’t find my place~
Perhaps this time she wouldn’t come back? Maybe. . .
Flashbacks of those few precious moments she had shared with him came to mind.
She had cherished those few laughs she shared with him. The few times over the years that they had just sat together and
God how she loved him.
Just for the fact that he was truthful, and intelligent. That, beneath that shell of deceit, lay his true self: sad, alone
and even vulnerable sometimes.
How she longed to truly know him. . .
But he would never see beyond her, right?
A sharp jab, and crimson began to stain her alabaster skin. She lay down silently, grasping her cut wrist.
~I’m pouring crimson regret and betrayal~
There was such a perfection when she did this; everything erased, the world forgotten.
Simply beautiful. . .
She came to realize that perhaps it was best is she left them all forever.
They would not miss her, would they? She was “unworthy” of them. . .
She did not want to leave without saying goodbye to him.
He was worth it all. . .
She made to get up, but found that her body would not move. Her legs felt numb. As well as her arms, and her head was spinning.
It was cold all of a sudden. She began to shiver violently, her teeth chattering.
This was getting scary. She had not meant to do this. It had gone too far.
She knew now that she was dying.
~In my field of solitude I will lay, forever here~
~I shall lie inside myself for hours~
~And watch the purple sky fly over me~
She was going to die in a place that she should belong in, but banished because of her magical race.
She began to scream out his name in her head. She was so sorry that she had not told him how she felt.
Now more than ever. . .
Her tears doubled as she lay there, his name in echoes.
“I love you, Draco. . .” she whispered.
There would be a huge shock once they found her body. . . The school would go into a panic. . .
But they would not miss her, would they? She was the Slytherin Mudblood. . .
Strong arms where wrapping around her, and she found herself pressed against a warm, solid body.
With much difficulty, she raised her head, tears leaking from her eyes as she stared blankly at him.
“Oh Blaise. . .”
He used the pad of his thumb to wipe away her tears, but suddenly froze, his beautiful blue-gray eyes widening.
He must have seen the blood. . .
She tried to concentrate on his eyes, but darkness was overtaking her body, as if someone was folding delicate lace over
her eyes. . .
~Will you ever truly be here for me?~
When Blaise awoke, it was to see that she was in the hospital wing.
The first thing she found was that the first greys and pinks were rising in the November sky.
The second thing she found was that Draco was sleeping soundly in a chair beside her bed. And that he looked as handsome
as ever as the dim light fell across his face.
The third thing that she found was that as she lay on her side, watching him sleep, he began to stir, a worried glint in
The last thing that she found was that when he pulled her into his arms, he was whispering words of relief and worry. .
Words of care and understanding. . .
Words of acceptance.